10/29/14

Dear Beyonce Fans . . .

You're dumb and I finally have proof! I've said (crassly) for YEARS that the only good thing to ever come out of Beyonce - Jay-Z put there (the grammar on the joke is a nightmare but you can't lead with the punchline) and FINALLY there is actual academic proof to substantiate my musical snobbery.



Now I know, I know . . . Jay-Z (and my beloved rap genre, as a whole) didn't do much better than his wife and the Dave Matthew's Band (a favorite from my college years) didn't exactly counteract all the (let's call it medicinal) marijuana I smoked during said phase but Ben Folds . . . for smart people. John Mayer (hate alllllll you want) would get you in to a solid, private school with a business program your parents could feel good about.  The Shins and Guster (whom I've long loved) are going to get you GRE pre-qualified by graduation day. And oh, oh, oh . . . LOOK! Coldplay and Sufjan Stevens are high on the chart and present to the right of average.

I am not saying this musical chart is "spot on" but I'd like to point out that I made gentle love and put a baby up in the ACTs and I was so rough on the SATs we needed a safety word and I giggled my way through the GREs.

I am joking, generally, about my smarts being verified by my musical tastes (everyone knows I'm a dummie and let's be honest - there are people who like bad/lower-scoring music for ironic intent and people who like good/higher-scoring music for aspriational intent) but it is interesting to note that, statistically, you looked at the chart above and either felt validated or criticized in it - hopefully the latter.