2/19/14

Funk . . .

I'm not exactly a "happy" person but I'm also not a "sad" person. I am a generally "content" person - meaning I pretty much accept where I am and what is going on, try to find the best in it and try to improve and better myself at any opportunity (as long as it doesn't require, you know, actual effort or work or perspective).

I don't know that I'm all that rare but I also don't think I'm universal in this mindset.

I know lots of people that are very "black" and "white" in how they view the world around them. Chick Little/Cry Wolf/Woe is Me types and Today is GREAT because my coffee mug says so/Look at how broad my smile is/The four pictures I have of my spouse and kids on my desk means everything is perfect types (if you are more comfortable with the analogies).

I don't have a problem with EITHER camp (but can't stand trying to interact with either type (I kid, I kid . . . but only sorta)). What I do have a problem with is when people are miserable in their own camps.

We all know these people . . . Heck-bent on being sad or "needing" to have a problem to solve. More frequently . . . the ones that will smile ear to ear while their home burns to the ground behind them and they pinkeye they got from their kid makes their entire face droop. You sorta take them/their positions at face value (and if you are like me you roll your eyes, make an internal voice criticism, and silently ask why they are not being more honest). You might do this for convenience or out of exhaustion or distraction with your own "stuff" - or worse - you may let it go out of apathy or a belief that asking this person that question is a waste of time because they won't be moved from their pedestal.

Push. Start asking questions and, soon enough, you realize they are not black or white - they are GREY (GRAY (fine, whatever, screw it)) like you and me. You may find them ready to step down off their post and to be honest with you - maybe cry, laugh, or sigh with relief that they can vacate the facade.

That is the beauty in asking questions and exploring a person and their mood. That is the joy of relationships (casual friendship through soul mate (dry heave)). This is why some argue that we humans are the top of the Animal Food Chain (our ability to "reason").

If you're not being honest with yourself and those around you and/or if you are not asking the right questions of people you fear are not being honest with you - there is genuine emotion and genuine joy and sadness being lost. There are experiences to bond and cleave (the joining vs. dividing type) and to help or share with each other that are being wasted. There is color - grey, orange, red, blue, purple, etc. being ignored.

Look for the color. Ask the right questions. Enjoy the beauty. Be a friend.