10/20/13

Pledge KMUW . . .

A few years ago . . . but the same level of insanity remains.
As many of you know, I'm sorta' obsessed with my KMUW. How obsessed? Let's just say that I won't see a movie Jim Erickson doesn't favorably review (that is not true) and the only woman I share my morning naked time with is Kate Clause. Not enough? I follow Lu Anne Stephens REAL Twitter account and Chandra Stauffer and I share a BFF necklace (I swallowed her half so she could never lose it). FINAL proof? The only man my daughter is allowed to marry is Jedd Beaudoin.

But it is not just the people of the station I'm obsessed with . . . it is the programming and the fact that NPR (through local, regional, and national programming) is the only broadcast outlet (and among the few outlets period) that gives long, deep looks at topics and subjects from breaking news to why the Nobel Prizes go to the people they go to. I don't think we'll ever be able to OVER support the things that are important to us but I sure do try.

I'm honored to, again this semi-annual drive, be involved with the station's pledge drive efforts. I'll be doing a few on-air shifts, I'll be answering phones, I'll be helping out with social media harassment and I'll be doing another round of "DonaSean" (as in donation but with the shun pronounced as Sean - I'm super, super crafty with the words and the English language and the stuff).

What is this year's theme? Self humiliation. Want to help? Here is how . . . we keep a running tally of how much my own little corner of the world gives to #PledgeKMUW efforts and as we pass the following thresholds, the following things happen . . .

$500 - I'll never pretend that I can help make a difference in my community again. And I'll shame you all for the rest of my life. Seriously, people.

$750 - I'll go to one of those Paint Your Own Pottery places and glaze something awesome and then sell it on eBay and give the proceeds to KMUW. How is that shameful? It's not other than the fact that there will be pictures of me wearing an apron and glazing pottery taken and shared. I don't like having my photo taken. I don't like aprons. I certainly don't like both combined.

$1,000 - I'll drink a cup on hot, black coffee with no cream, no artificial sweeteners, no flavorings/spices/syrups, no NOTHING. And you should know that there is no smell I dislike MORE than coffee (okay, fine, there are lots I like less but none that everyone else claims to love) and the taste of coffee makes my tongue angry. And you wouldn't want to see my tongue angry.

$1,250 - I'll go another six months without openly obsessing over my two favorite things in the world (boobs) on Twitter. You roll your eyes but it takes EFFORT for me to stay strong on this one.

$1,500 - I'll go to Sugar Sisters and buy something. I won't eat it but I will patronize their business and I'll smile while doing it and Tweet about how wonderful the experience was.

$1,750 - I will answer any question that can be asked in a one-hour period by contributors (we'll schedule it out ahead of time) and in a Tweet with no holds-barred or limits. Don't think that would be hard for a guy like me who lives as an open book? Try harder, dig deeper, make it horrible.

$2,000 - I'll go on a date with the (willing) woman of Justin Londagin and Bailey Blair's choice (start campaigning now, ladies). I'll take carnations to her when I pick her up. She can order anything she likes on the 2-for-$20 menu at the chain restaurant of her choice and she can have the entire dessert (I'm a generous suitor) AND I'll spring for one alcoholic beverage (she'll need it). I'll hang on her every word for the entire evening and won't even try any funny business. I'm still technically married.

$2,250 - I'll let Megan Lovely decide what I should do with my (remaining) hair. No cut, color, direction, or decision will be vetoed as long as the work is being done by a trained and licensed professional (she doesn't get hedge trimmers and a blindfold).

$2,500 - I'll wear fine waled corduroys until the fabric wears out or an actual fire sparks between my thighs. The mere thought of it is horrifying (and by "it" I mean fine waled corduroy on a man my size).

$3,000 - I'll go swimming in the Arkansas River. On November 15th. NO MATTER what the weather is like or the pollution scare on that day. And you can take photos or video. The EMTs might need clues as to what is actually wrong with me.

$3,500 - I'll let whoever casts the $3,499th dollar in to the pot decide. (Some restrictions apply, see store for details.)

$4,000 - I will meet with a "Life Coach" and bring a box of Kleenex, an open mind, and participatory intention - I make no promises on what happens after that but you can imagine . . . can't you?!

(WE DID IT! $4,141 (including some matching funds) - THANK YOU, people!)

Only YOU can keep my Twitter stream "boob free" for another six months (it has been two full years now so I feel like we can keep the streak going) so SPREAD THE WORD! Any pledges FULFILLED that are tagged "DonaSean" on the pledge (you can enter it in the special comments blank through the website or tell your volunteer on the phone or in person) will be credited to the total and every dollar helps (but every thousand dollars is way, way more fun) AND that are Tweeted at me (@SeanCAmore) or e-mailed to me (SeanCAmore-at-Gmail-dot-com) or mentioned as a comment on this here post will help.

CALL 6AM - 6PMish      10/16 - 10/26ish - (316) 978-6700
PLEDGE ONLINE          Click here

I'll keep everyone updated on how we are doing against our goal (which is a big $4,000 this drive).

THANK YOU for your patience as I go crazy for the next two weeks over this drive and THANK YOU (even more) for breaking out your piggy bank, coffee fund, boob job savings, or "walking around money" and giving it to KMUW.